Personally, I have a bazillion things to be thankful for. I do, however, find it difficult to appreciate all that I am thankful for this year. How can I? When I see my country in disarray, burdened with man-made inflation, food shortages, people refusing to work regardless of their own economic positions, supply chain nightmares (again, man-made), high home energy costs, skyrocketing gas prices, valueless paper money and of course the difficulty many, many people have been feeling as they attempt to piece together a Thanksgiving Day meal. I can’t be happy and joyous during this holiday when I know damn well there are lots and lots of my fellow people suffering. And there is nothing We The People can do about it right now. Nothing. Except to be kind to one another. That’s about it.

Maybe there’s a rainbow for all of us at the end of the tunnel. Maybe we should have hope that things will improve. Maybe all of this is happening so that we toughen up and will be super grateful for any good news that’s comes our way. I dunno. I have no idea. I understand that all things happen for a reason. But this thing happening is man made and not by ourselves. None of us enjoy being manipulated and used for another’s advantage. And that’s just what we are. Pawns in the chess game of life.

As economies go down, they also go up. I’m certain there will one day be good times once again. Till then, we all must do what we all must do.

I’m grateful for my family. At least for those still left living. Losing my brother and a sister-in-law during the pandemic will always be a constant reminder to me, especially during holiday times, of what was lost, never to be replaced. We all, regardless, must continue onward. I’m thankful for my husband and for his undeterred love for me. I’m thankful for my sister who has on occasion doubled as my mother and guided me out of my darkest times. I’m thankful for my two daughters who despite being in their forties still fight with each other as if they were teenagers. I find their disputes to be non-sensical and entertaining. I’m thankful for my home, that I have a roof over my head always. I’m thankful that we have a vehicle. I’m thankful that however inconsequential, I actually have a savings account.

I’m thankful that God still loves me. Somehow He finds it in his heart to remember me and watch over me and keeps my unhappiness at bay. The other day a long time friend came to visit hubby and I. We have been friends for over forty years. He and his wife sold their home here and moved down to Florida. He was back up to visit with some family members when he stopped by to say hello. Afterwards, he texted my husband to say (and I quote) “Cindi looks GOOD” (his capitalization, not mine) ” I haven’t seen her smile in years. It’s good to see her smiling again.”

I guess I must be happy and it shows. I had no idea I was happy. But once he mentioned it, I realized I was happy. Somehow through it all I manage to hold some semblance of normalcy in my life. Or maybe it’s perhaps I just don’t give a hoot about anything anymore and I am just content to finally be myself and live out the rest of my life as best as I can. I turn 71 in a few days. Other than being slightly overweight I’m in great health and just thankful that God has kept me alive. For what purpose, I have no idea. Maybe it’s just to share my life with others. Maybe it’s so others can learn a thing or two from my own experiences. I dunno.

All I know right now is this:

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